The Mill ***3/5 stars

Central Avenue is weird. There are a lot of cheesy car dealerships and furniture stores filled with gloss black laquered bedroom sets with marbled mirrored headboards. And there are places where you can buy outdated electronics out of some back alley garage door. It's a bit frozen in time... it's a bit rough... But things are evolving in certain areas, The Mill being one of those modern, yet quaint refreshments.

While the floorspace is minimal, the building is tall and lofty.

Inside, you'll find a tight, cozy space with tables and booths and oh my dear god, A FULL BAR. My neighborhood in South MPLS has about 3 liquor licenses and they've all been taken. Sometimes you just need a good, strong drink at 11am, ya know?! The hard working men and women of Central Avenue know what's up. And they do dinner here, too, so that's promising.

This place was hoppin'. But we only had to wait a few minutes for a booth. They have little blueberry muffins at the host station to tide you over...

The menu is quite diverse. They do brunch EVERY DAY from 10 to 3pm. Hashes and quiches and bennies and the lunch brunch stuff - burgers and whatnot.

So we essentially got club style bottle service for brunch. A bottle of bubbles with several mixing options...orange, grapefruit and mango with some creme de casis (totally gross and unnecessary.) And Molly got a latte. Get crazy, girl!

So let's look at the food, shall we? These are the glorious cinnamon wild rice pancakes that I was jealously eyeing the whole brunch. Yeah, I decided to go gluten-free. It's been amazing, but I miss cakes!!!

And this is the benny with a side salad. Note: you can get your benny with lobster... for $16.

Another benny with potatoes... Kelly was not happy that they were drenched in goat cheese.

And here's the Ecuadorian Baked Eggs. God I love beans for breakfast. This was fantastic.

The Mill is worth a trip to Central Ave. You could kill two birds and get a used VCR and a faux gold plated coffee table...

Me and Kel.

This girl on the right survived brain surgery, twice. You're tough, Roach!

Cheers from bad eggs. See ya next time...

The Freehouse ***3/5 stars

They said it couldn't possibly happen, but another giant hops brewing facility has sprung up, and out, down in the warehouse district. This sprawling establishment makes Fulton look like a lemonade stand (don't get me wrong, Fulton is still has its charm). Freehouse is like the Vegas of brew pubs here in town, complete with giant digitized, sparkle and fade signage.

Freehouse don't eff around.

Big enough to have your german-catholic family reunion.

We ventured upon this estab on the fine, balmy 14 degree morning of Stuporbowl, the infamous winter alleycat bike race. We needed a base for biking and drinking, two of my favorite activities combined into one! DP says the bloody here is more than acceptable. Look at that hunk of cheddar love.

Captain my captain

So this place is pretty serious about breakfast, but they know how to have fun with it. The menu has some inventive stuff, like this musli with fruity pebbles and whipped cream. Huh? (It's actually really good. You might have an erotic dream about it later...just sayin.) A word to the marketeers, who think they're pretty sly when they wrote breakfast as "breaky" on the menu. Yo, it's Brekky, not Breaky. Breaky is just, well, something that is apt to be broken, like Billy Ray Cyrus's heart (every time Miley twerks). Prolly shoulda thought a little more about that one...

Any self-respecting high-brow breakfast spot these days has to do something with lobster and charge you $16 for it. This take on "toad in a hole" made me resign my gluten-free diet for the day. The lobster was generously portioned.

Someone always has to get the standard "farmy" breakfast. This one's a pile of cheese and browns and caramelized onions.

This is the veggie hash...eggs, potato, carrot, fennel, peppers, peas. Thanks, Beth.

 Mapping the route... We came up with a conservative team name.

The parking lot here rivals Walmart. Bring your kids and a camper, stay for a month. Or be cool and ride your bike. Teens above zero is a tropical heat wave! Peace out...

Paul rockin' his new head gear. Matt and Beth pop unlocking.

Bridget's ballin' in her new goggles.

The Wienery **2/5 stars

Jeff has been telling me that the Wienery is his favorite breakfast for some time. We finally got up to it on one of those recently rare winter days in MN where the temp got above freezing...

Nestled in the colorful neighborhood of the West Bank, amongst equally aged facades and the towering retro, candy-colored crack stacks, lies the Wienery. No surprise, this is a legendary estab. Since the early 80s this joint has been slingin' dogs. But it wasn't until '99 that Pat added breakfast. People speak fondly, including Guy Fieri, but we here at Bad Eggs know better than to trust a man with frosted tips...

Ahoy! Inside is tiny and wonderfully decayed...a couple tables and a long counter with red vinyl stools. Behind the counter is a disorderly order of old books, photos, prison bracelets and hippie art. Yes, when you get out of prison, your first meal here is free. Keep that in mind.

The menu is your basic diner breakfast fare. Eggs, meat, hashbrowns. I wonder if they trademarked the Wienie McMuffin...

Jeff says you have to go here when Pat is cooking. He wasn't cooking today. We got some food, but it apparently was not Pat's caliber. Here's my extra greasy omelet...

And J's extra greasy sausage patty...

I was definitely underwhelmed by the food, but the atmosphere was so darn charming with the the classic country jams and the warm sun dancing through this stained-glass wiener. I'd give it another chance. Maybe the next time I get out of prison...